After three weeks, I finally dive back into the swimming pool. Luckily my blue hair is still in tact and the chlorine only fades it slightly. My endurance takes a beating though. It takes me an hour to do 30 laps when I normally do them in half the time.

Avril Lavigne's sophomore CD "Under My Skin" debuts atop the Billboard charts. It's her first #1 album, for her debut CD "Let Go" was stalled at #2. After countless listens, the album has gotten under my skin and the songs are catchy for a teenaged songwriter.

My Honey B. Fly Mariah Carey fan club kit comes in. The second club t-shirt is sleek, but very gay. Also included is an autographed Mariah mousepad. The new Mariah album will be out this coming fall. Plus there's talk about other acting opportunities and publishing a children's book.

There is a God! Rock band Creed calls it quits. They weren't exactly a rancid band, but they were lost in the shuffle with worse acts Nickelback and Default. Now if only those two bands break up, God would have taste.

I missed Trevie's birthday last year because I was sick. There's no way I would miss it again. I show up at the Black Dog and am stuck there by myself for almost an hour before birthday boy shows up. He gives me a smooch. That boy sure does like kissing...and he's not even gay, well not yet that is. He says I have very soft lips. Yes I do. Trae is a lucky man. The night turns into the invasion of the St. Albert punks.

Then Lany, Vanessa, Brian, and I head over to Squires. My Boop finally introduces me to her new man, De-rill. It's about fucking time. I can't believe that I'm the last one of her closest friends to meet him. I give Darrell the third degree, questioning him on his intentions. Nobody's going to hurt my Boop. I suppose the boy passes the test...for now.

Allana is just three years old, but she remembers that I promise to take her to see Barney the Purple Dinosaur. She says if I didn't take her to see him, then that would make me a liar. Allana takes me accesory shopping first. She has to look at every item in a store first before she can move on to the next. Then we wait on the shopping mall floor for an hour before the Barney show. Allana enjoys the show, but she is asking me where are all of Barney's friends. After the show, we line up to take a picture with Barney. Forty minutes of waiting later, Allana refuses to have her picture taken. She sure is stubborn. Once she makes up her mind, it rarely can be changed. Before I drop her off, Allana thanks me. I ask her why is she thanking me. "Because you bought me so much stuff, crazy pig!" Damn that girl has smarts and sass.

Ronald Reagan, the 40th President of the United States, dies after a decade long battle with Alzheimer's disease. He was a President that was admired.

Apparently Jennifer Lopez is trying to catch up to Elizabeth Taylor. J. Lo marries husband #3, Marc Anthony, just six months after Bennifer. Jenny's not from the block, but rather she's been around the block!

After an exhausting weekend working at the hotel, Andy phones me up and asks me to go for sushi. I hate fish. At first I turn down the invite, but on later thought and with the realization that it is a late birthday dinner for Andy, I decide to go. I guess I can take one for the team and try a piece of raw salmon. Dinner is crazy with Andy ordering 320 pieces of salmon. But Andy, Judd and Danny are up for the challenge...plus Linda surprises everyone with her appetite.

After playing a record 26 games in the playoffs, the Calgary Flames lose to the Tampa Bay Lightning in Game 7 of the finals. Thanks for the run Calgary, for giving us all Canadians and bandwagon jumpers some hope that the Stanley Cup would come home. The hockey finals are the most grueling in all of sport -- 60 days of non-stop hitting, fighting and bone-crushing action.

Legendary R&B crooner Ray Charles dies. Two big names of my lifetime dies...I'm waiting on the third.

Working at the hotel is all right, but then I'm scheduled to work a breakfast buffet starting at 6:30. That's way too early, or way too late if you consider that I sometimes go to bed then. I am asked to work more permanently but I refuse. I'd rather just be a casual. Being pretty much unemployed for over half a year has really cut the purse strings. But once one job comes, others follow in its wake. Rose wants me back at Panache but in a promoted position. Maybe it is true that I'm a Panache lifer.

Trae moves out of the house and becomes roommates with Mark. Now he's even closer to the Las Vegas strip.

Rose asks me to work the Panache garage sale. There are endless boxes of over run tiles and rejects. It's funny how Rose is running around the neighbourhood putting up last minute signs, while I stay and deal with the customers. I think I over priced a couple of items but they sold. With minimal organization, the garage sale rakes in over $1,400.

Nicole Kidman is one of the "Stepford Wives." In this remake, the first half is witty and the zingers are sharp. But then I become confused with some of the movie's inconsistencies. Are they robots? Or is it a computer chip? Nevertheless, Nicole is great in the movie. Even better is Bette Midler. But Glen Close's performance just reminds me of her being Cruella Deville.

Damn Jordan. He makes me buy cereal to collect Spider-man toys. Jordan is upset because he is stuck with Doc Ock. But I luck out and get the Spider Web toy. I buy another box of cereal the next day and get the same one. So lucky for Jordan now that he has a Spider Web toy too.

Jordan and I also catch "The Girl Next Door" at the cheap theatre. The movie seems long and although the language is vulgar, I do enjoy it. It's one of those raunchy teenage movies that all sixteen-year-old boys must see.

The Complete Fourth Season of the "Simpsons" is released. Thank God it didn't take a year between the release of the 3rd and 4th seasons like it did with between the 2nd and 3rd. When is Season 5 coming out?

The Los Angeles Lakers, the favorite to win the World Championships fall to the underdogs Detroit Pistons in five games. The Pistons are a cohesive unit whose defense stops the individual Laker superstars. This is the Cinderella story of sport this year. The Calgary Flames failed for the fairytale ending. The same owner owns both the Pistons and the Stanley Cup Champions Tampa Bay Lightning.

It's the beginning of Gay Pride in Edmonton with the rainbow flag raising at City Hall. This year's theme is Pioneering Pride. Last year the mayor was forced into proclaiming Gay Pride Week and this year he does again. But for the first time, the rainbow flag is raised at City Hall and will fly high and proud for 10 days. Sherri is in town for the weekend and I take her to Buddy's. We meet up with Dollard there and dance the night away. Sherri thinks fags are hilarious. I know...they are hilarious in dress and in personality.

It's amazing how nice the weather is every year for the Pride Parade. Like the previous year, I watch the parade with both Allana & Alana. The parade seems to last longer than usual, but I guess the floats stopped at each intersection. Also notable this year are the 6 protesters with their religious views. The parade is very political too, with gay Councilor Michael Phair and Deputy Prime Minister Anne McLellan, the parade marshalls. With the upcoming election in the next week, there is a lot of campaigning done down Jasper Avenue.

Gay Days are exhausting. The opening weekend is full of booze. I meet up with Judd and Fung at Thornton Court to have martinis before I wander over to the Roost. The place is packed and I have to wait twenty minutes in line. Maybe I am drunk, or maybe I'm just celebrating my pride because I dance the night away. And I usually don't dance. And usually not by myself.

Ben Stiller's fourth movie in five months this year is truly the top dog. The balls-in-crotch gags lands "Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story" at the top of the box office, burying Steven Spielberg's and Tom Hank's "The Terminal" at number two. I watch the latter first because I prefer smarter comedy over dumb. Who knew living in an airport could be so interesting. Hanks once again gives a stellar performance. Spielberg tells the story so delicately and all the laughs are on cue. "Dodgeball" on the other hand relies on the old joke of guys being hit in the balls...It's one of those unexplained phenomenon that summons laughter. The movie is one dumb joke after another, along with star cameo apppearances. But it's a great way to forget about the problems in the world and just laugh out loud.

My parents finally decide and buy a new vehicle, the Toyota Corolla LE. It's my father's new toy as he spends way too much time admiring it. But I guess when you have been meaning to buy a new car for countless years and then finally purchasing one, it's a big deal.

ETERNAL SUMMER OF THE SPOTLESS MIND
The new vWayner.com seasonal CD is released. The summer compilation is parodied after the movie, "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind." This CD boasts some scorching jams from Usher and Prince. It has same amazing vocal tracks from such divas as Mariah, Janet Jackson and George Michael. It has everything from teenage drama queens to gay drama queens. Order yours today!

An admirer gives me $50 to buy myself a ticket to LAW & ORDER--a night of eight boxing matches, including one with America's "bad girl" Tonya Harding fighting with local boxer Amy Johnson. But then I find out through Betty's sister that I can buy V.I.P. tickets for $125 and have ringside seats and dinner. V.I.P. seats it is. Unfortunately the women's light heavyweight match is cancelled because of technical difficulties, but the audience is treated to a very entertaining night of fighting with 3 TKO's. The best fight, because of her celebrity status is Tonya Harding's. I wanted to bring in a sign which says "Hit Tonya in the knee Amy!" But Johnson doesn't need any encouragement from me. She just pummels Tonya with punch after punch. It's amazing how Tonya can take the hits. I guess all that extra fat she put on helps. Johnson takes Tonya out in round number 3 with a technical knockout. Later I receive an autograph from Ms. Amy Johnson.

Alana calls me up and asks me to buy her a cell phone and an umbrella. I oblige...though it's not a real cellular. Not yet anyways.

I invite myself to Ron's pride barbeque. I think it's about time I get myself into the gay loop. I have my lesbian friends, but I don't have too many gay friends. They're all a bunch of fags, and I say that with the utmost respect.

The Pride Dance, or the Prance, is at the Polish Hall. I playfully harass the straight Polish bartenders telling them they should swing. They are a great sport, and one of them even has great hair. Then it's the Roost after. And I run into my former waiter Stuart, who now is a nurse. But that doesn't stop him from kissing me. I also drop my Oakleys and I'm frantic trying to find them. I check with the coat check five minutes later and somebody returned them. It is such a lucky night for me.

The Chinese Freemasons Barbeque is a couple weeks early this year. It's a good thing because it's beautiful weather all weekend, as opposed to the dreary rain infested outing last year. The steaks are pretty raw; they're thrown onto the grill, flipped and then tossed onto my plate. Alberta beef -- is there anything better? The girls end up playing frisbee, and the rest of the guys end up playing football. Two hand touch football.

After the barbeque, the gang grabs sundaes at McDonald's. Then in the parking lot, we spend another quarter of an hour deciding what to do next. We have afternoon cocktails on Thornton Court's patio. The view is extremely beautiful and the weather pleasant. We cannot say that about the service.

The Federal Election. I've been a Liberal my entire life and my position has yet to be changed. Though the Liberal Party loses seats and its majority government, Paul Martin and his Liberals will be forming the next minority government. In Alberta, it is a sea of blue Conservatives except for two seats in Edmonton. The Deputy Prime Minister Anne McLellan is re-elected and so is another prominent MP David Kilgour.

Tobey Maguire is back as the friendly neighbourhood hero in "Spider-Man 2." It is one of the best superhero movies ever. Spiderman is unmasked in this chapter as it propels the story of the Marvel Comics character.

June Essentials

June marks the beginning of summer, but more importantly, it marks the beginning of Gay Days with the bois of summer coming out and strutting their stuff. From shirtless men running down Jasper, shirtless men rollerblading through the river valley, to shirtless men dancing in the clubs, summer brings out the hotties.

David Beckham graces the cover of Vanity Fair. Bare it like Beckham...damn he has mighty fine abs. Too bad he isn't gay.

Pick up Avril Lavigne's CD. If you want to listen to an angry teenager rock it, then this is your safest bet. New single "Happy Ending" is racing up the mainstream charts.

The comic book blockbuster sequel of the summer is one of the best superhero movies ever.

Listen to Melanie Doane's "You Are What You Love."